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“All You Do Is Take,” My Father Said—So I Stopped Paying

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noticed it had been done.

I didn’t resent it, not at first. Middle children learn early that attention is a finite resource, and I adapted the way middle children do: by becoming useful. Useful is a sustainable position in a family. It’s not glamorous, but it’s stable. You always have a role. The problem is that useful, over time, becomes invisible—and continue reading …

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